Time Is A Fickle Thing
by life is short so am I
Summary: The war has just ended, and Naruko is the last one standing. Everybody is dead. Gone. So, in typical time travel fashion, Naruko is sent back in time. This time around, she wasn't going to lose any of her precious people (and quite possibly boil Madara and Tobi in oil, but that sounds way less heroic). Kaka/fem!Naru
1. Chapter 1

… **it's just something that's been haunting all of my waking hours, okay!**

**Oh, and I don't own Naruto. **

**"Testing, testing, this is a biju talking"**

* * *

"The sky is blue," Naruko murmured.

"**No Duh. I'll start getting worried about your mental capabilities, Brat if you keep making observations like that one," **Kurama grumbled sarcastically.

"No, you didn't let me finish. In all the movies, TV shows, books, the sky always reflected the main characters emotions. Since I'm the last one standing, I guess that makes me the main character of all of this. The sky shouldn't be blue," Naruko said, her voice blank, eyes not taking in the bloodbath of a battlefield before her.

There were craters everywhere, and the bodies of those that had survived to this point were mostly burned and unrecognizable. Her eyes flickered over to the body of Kakashi, the only thing left was, ironically enough, his mask. Damn man seemed to have had it made fireproof. Well, she couldn't really blame him, with how Sasuke used to throw fire around like it was nothing.

"**Oh?" **Kurama said, prompting her to go on.

"No, it should be rainy to make up for the tears that I just can't seem to cry," she said, frustration creeping in.

"**You've gone off into the deep end."**

"Like you're one to talk," Naruko retorted.

"**Fine then. Keep making comments like that and I won't offer to send you back into time. See how you like that!" **Kurama said triumphantly.

"… what?"

"**Oh, is this one of the things that you're supposed to ease somebody into?" **he said, and if Naruko hadn't been so busy with her shock, she would have gotten the feeling that Kurama was blinking in confusion.

"…"

"**Hello? Naruko? Has what ever left of your brain fried?"**

"… give me one good reason to not shave your tails," she threatened.

"**Do it. See if I'll send you back," **he taunted.

"Give me one good reason that I should even go back. I'd have to redo all this shit all over again!" she said, gesturing to the grounds that their final fight took place on.

"**You could save them all. And you could get all of your revenge that you didn't in this timeline."**

"I don't believe in revenge. You know that Kurama."

"**You just saw Madara kill your mate right in front of you. In the heat of the battle, you killed him. You didn't kill him slowly enough for the things that he did, and you know it," **Kurama said, his red eyes hardening.

"So you're trying to convince me to go back, just because I didn't get satisfying enough revenge for the both of us? Like that's going to work," she spat.

"**Look around. There's nothing here for you, Brat. Nobody survived. Your mate is dead, your friends are all dead, and the kit that you were supposed to have never even saw light before it was killed in your own stomach. I cant believe that I even have to try to convince you. You could redo it all."**

"All of it?" she said, her voice hitching slightly at the end.

"**Well obviously not all of it. You have to decide a time to go back to. It would be too, on risk of sounding like your deceased friend, troublesome to go back to when you're too young to do anything,"** Kurama explained.

"I'd have to get them to know me all over again, if I even went. Did you know how hard it was the first with Sasuke on my team?" she demanded.

"**Better have to do that, than have no one."**

"I have you."

"**Brat, I'm a thousands of years old demon. I may be the most powerful and awesome of them all, but even I can swallow my pride just to admit that I'm not enough for you."**

"But Kakashi…" she trailed off.

"**Listen, Naruko, I'm going to tell you this one time and one time only," **he warned, "**It will be harder to resurrect them than to go back and make him fall in love with you all over again."**

She hesitated, that said, "But what if he doesn't? What if he never loves me again? Kurama, I don't think I could live with myself if he didn't."

"**So that's what this is all about! Bah, you mortals are so confusing! Listen, because now I have to tell you another piece of common sense that can't seem to grasp! Would you rather never see him, or anybody else, again, or would you rather go back and save them?" **Kurama demanded.

Naruko thought for a minute. The pain of seeing them die was too fresh, she didn't know what she would do if she saw them. On the other hand, Kurama was right. On all accounts too.

She really hated it when he was right on all accounts.

"Okay," she sighed, "what do I have to do?"

"**It's a seal, of course. But the first thing that you have to do is figure out when you want to end up. I'd recommend sometime around your Genin years, but the choice is up to you."**

"My Genin years sound fine. I think the day that we got our teams is good. Yes," she nodded, her eyes burning with new found determination, "the first day of our team."

Kurama beamed, as much as a monstrous fox could anyways, and said, "**Great! Now all you need to do is…"**

He droned on, and on, but for once in her life Naruko could listen to a lecture. Frowning slightly, she drew out the insanely complex seal. There was so much that she had to specify, such as when she wanted to end up and how many souls that she was carrying with her, ect. They would both end up in the same bodies that they had at the time, and while it wouldn't do much for Kurama, she would, for all intents and purposes, be twelve again. Twelve, while her mind stayed at twenty.

Hours later, when she was finally done the seal, Naruko stood staring down at it. Now all she would have to do was stand in the middle of it, activate it, and wait a minute for it to work.

"**Brat, there's something that you have to know,"** Kurama said, as soon as she had activated the seal and there was no turning back, "**there's a sixty percent chance that you'll die from the pain of taking over a soul in less than a millisecond. This body will be soulless, and die. Surprise!"**

The birds feasting on the remaining bodies took off at the resounding scream of anger.


	2. Chapter 2

**Thank-you to all that followed and favorited. Special thanks to the one who reviewed. Let's just say that Naruko doesn't want anybody to know who she marries. And now Kakashi will be paranoid of all the girls he meets.**

**Almost forgot! I don't own Naruto. **

* * *

Hatake Kakashi did not want to teach snotnosed ninja wannabes. He did not want to teach a pink haired girl pretending to be a ninja to impress her crush. He did not want to teach a spoiled boy who was hell bent on avenging his clan. He did _not_ want to teach the immature daughter of his sensei who acted like her mother.

So he decided to turn up late. Not that that that was unusual for him, but normally he was only a little over an hour late. He decided to be three and a half this time. And tomorrow as well.

Hell, if they passed, her promised himself that he would be at least three hours late to every damn meeting they had. Maybe they would request a new sensei after some time, and he'd never have to see the brats again.

Kakashi heard a voice coming from the classroom that the kids that he was being forced to teach were in, "Hah. A Jonin isn't going to fall for a plain old booby trap like that."

"Yeah! Naruko, you're so stupid," Kakashi frowned. He hadn't read any of the files that he was given on them, but it seemed like the history of Team Seven was destined to be repeated.

Kakashi entered, making sure to check the floor for any trap wires. Looking down as he was, he didn't notice the real trap until the chalk brush hit his head.

Naruko started laughing, blue eyes wide with delight. Kakashi grimaced behind his mask, berating himself for underestimating them. That girl of his sensei's seemed to be a lot like her mother. Too much like her mother.

Damn. He had a mini Kushina on his team

He frowned when the girl cut herself off. Kushina would have milked it for all it's worth. Laughing and exclaiming her brilliance.

She was just lying there, like she had just died.

Odd, but it might be another trick. He couldn't count the number of times her mother had pretended to faint then nail him with fluorescent paint when he ran up to check on her.

But he didn't need to check on her because Sakura was.

She stared at him in confusion, "I only know what the textbook said about heart beats, but even I can tell that it's faint. And…," her eyes widened in horror, "I don't think she's breathing!"

She started hyperventilating, "What do I do? What do I do! Oh kami! She's going to die! She's going to die and it will be all my fault because I'm panicking and I forget CPR! Oh kami! Oh kami!-"

This was around the time that Kakashi stopped listening, because he was at the twelve year old blondes side in an instant, performing the CPR that Sakura had forgotten in her panic.

Her eyes snapped open and she surged forward, and he was on the ground with her hand on his throat before he could even process that her eyes were even bluer than Minato's had been.

"Maa, maa, no need to be so aggressive," Kakashi said, helping her up. He stopped to consider for a moment before he hesitantly asked, "Do you need to go to the hospital?"

Poor girl seemed shell shocked, but she shook her head, shying away from him.

"Are you okay? You were just laughing, them bam! You're passed out and not breathing!" Sakura said, scanning over the girl with worried eyes.

Naruko didn't seem to be listening. She was staring at her fingers like she had never seen them before.

Sasuke was even starting to look worried.

"Dobe-" he started, but before he had even finished his thought, the girl had shot forward, and latched on to him and the other girl.

"It worked!" she hollered, "it worked, it worked, it worked!"

"What are you talking about?" demanded a thoroughly creeped out Sasuke.

"You're alive! It worked!" the blond burst into laughter suddenly, and Kakashi was forced to consider if she was sane or not.

"Baka!" Sakura hit her over the head, "of course we're alive! Stop hugging Sasuke-kun!"

The blond sat on a desk and seemed to be listening to something nobody could hear, "Hmm, you're right, I shouldn't have said that. Now they know somethings up. I am not!" Naruko suddenly burst out.

"Wh-who are you talking to?" asked a suddenly nervous Sakura, edging away from her new teammate.

"My inner demon. He lives in my stomach," Naruko said absentmindedly, until she realized what she said and started hitting her head with her hand muttering, "baka," under her breath every time she hit her head.

Kakashi snapped to attention. He immediately grabbed her wrists, and said seriously, "Naruko, this is serious. You need to tell me what he said, okay? This is really important."

Irritation and something else that he couldn't read passed through her eyes, but he paid it no thought.

"Well, right now, he's calling me an idiot that doesn't know how to keep her mouth shut, and if I keep going on like this, than they'll figure us out in no time. Now he's saying that I'm a bigger idiot than everybody he knows combined, and now he's silent because I'm explaining something to him," she said.

"Come along kiddies," Kakashi finally said, after processing that the fox wasn't telling her to kill everybody in sight, "we're taking a visit to the Hokage."

Naruko exhaled a breath, excitedly saying, "Jiji's alive too! This day keeps getting better and better!"

"Naruko… we're all alive," Sakura said awkwardly.

"Right!" Naruko beamed, making to follow Kakashi out the class. She promptly tripped over her feet.

"Hurry up!" Kakashi snapped, his patience fraying.

Kakashi lost count of how many times Naruko tripped over her own feet on the way to the Hokage tower.

He did see the heated glares the villagers shot at her when they caught sight of them. Sakura was shifting nervously, Sasuke seemed to be ignoring them, but any half-way decently trained ninja could see that he was tense. The sad thing was Naruko seemed to be right at home. She didn't even glance at any of them, and she seemed to be vibrating with excitement.

He could swear that she was muttering, "alive, alive, alive," over and over again under her breath, but he didn't turn around to check.

When they got to the Hokage's office, Kakashi was certain that Naruko was vibrating in excitement.

She didn't even knock on the door to see if anybody was in there, she just burst in shouting, "Jiji! You're alive!"

The Sandaime frowned, "Naruko, of course I'm alive. For all I know, I've never been dead."

"That's right," Naruko said, nodding sagely, "you don't die until the Chunin exams."

Sarutobi blinked owlishly at her.

Kakashi decided to ignore whatever odd things she said from now on, "She's been talking to the demon."

"Naruko, is this true?" the Hokage said, brushing off what she said earlier to turn his stern gaze to the blond.

"Yep," she said nodding.

Both of the ninja stared at her for the open admittance.

With a long suffering sigh, the Hokage grabbed a bottle of sake, muttering, "I'm not drunk enough for this."

"Oh," Naruko said, with the air of somebody who had been searching for years but never got the answer to the question posed until now, "that's where Tsunade-baa-chan got it from!"

The Hokage spewed out the sake that he had just taken a sip out of.

All Kakashi could say was, "did you just call Tsunade your grandmother?"

"Well, no matter how much she wants to deny it, Tsunade is old. Old enough to be my granny. And it really pissed her off, so I called her granny all the time!" Naruko.

"Naruko," the Hokage said, "how do you know Tsunade?"

"After you die, which you won't be doing now that I know and can prevent it, Jiraya and I went to go fetch her. Than she became the Godaime and we all lived happily ever after until it all went to hell," Naruko beamed, but there was an underlying sadness in her eyes.

"Wait, wait, wait, hold up," Sakura said, "what the heck is going on?"

"Thank kami," Naruko said, "I've been waiting for somebody to ask me that since I got back. You see, Kurama just gave me this really neat seal that sends a person back into the time and body of, well, whenever they want to go. It's really quite painful, and you have quite a good chance of dying, but really, now I get to change stuff. I even have proof!" with that Naruko shot forward like a bullet, and somehow grabbed onto each of them.

And now Kakashi was wondering how the hell that girl had gotten them into a sewer.

"Where are we?" Sasuke finally spoke up. Sakura squeaked.

"Were in my mindscape. Welcome and all that. Now, forward march! Oh, and if you hear any growling or threats of a torturous death, that's just Kurama. He's the demon that lives in my stomach," a decidedly not twelve year old Naruko said.

"Wha…?" Kakashi said, his brain on overload.

The twelve year old girl was replaced by a twenty year old woman. A really pretty twenty year old woman. Though Minato would torture him to death for even thinking this, the woman before him was quite beautiful. In fact, if Kakashi had even read the file he was given on her, he would have noticed that Naruko actually looked quite a lot like sexy no jutsu. But, you know, with clothes.

"Let me put it into simple words," Not-Twelve-Naruko said, glancing at him with something akin to amusement while they walked, "Hello, I'm a twenty year old Naruko. After everyone dies, Kurama convinced me to go back in time, to my twelve year old body. The seal that I used causes quite a bit of pain. It also has a forty percent chance of survival, but I didn't know that until the seal was activated."

Naruko stopped to push open a random door.

"I'm too old for this," the Hokage sighed.

Naruko scoffed, "Like hell you are old man! You are going to live to see your second grandson be born! I'll make sure of it, believe it!"

"What's that?" Sasuke said, pointing to a cage in the distance.

"That's Kurama's cage," Naruko said, "be careful, he doesn't like… well he doesn't like anything, but if you get too close he might try to kill you. Just so you know."

"This is the weirdest day of my life," Sakura said, "they said nothing about this at the academy."

"They don't say a lot of stuff at the academy," Kakashi said, amused despite himself. After all, Sakura probably made the biggest understatement of the century.

"Hey," Sakura said, as she just realized something, "if you're from the future, do you know who I get married to?"

She was glancing at Sasuke, but Naruko said, "You get married to a guy named Rock Lee. Nice boy, if eccentric. He's pretty much a carbon copy of Gai-sensei."

Kakashi stiffened, eyeing Sakura as if she was going to burst into a speech about Youth. He shuddered at the very thought.

"Sasuke dies as a lonely bastard, Kakashi's engaged, Kiba and Hinata get married, Shikamaru is married to the daughter of the Kazekage, I'm engaged, and whole bunch of other people are married," Naruko said evasively.

Engaged. Kakashi thought dumbly. He got engaged.

"Who?" he demanded, staring at the twenty year old blonde, "who do I get married to."

"I'll tell you…" she said pensively, "after you two have your first kiss."

"What? That would take forever! Does she even live in Konoha?" Kakashi asked, annoyed at the girl before him.

"I die?" Sasuke said.

"Didn't you hear me? I said that everybody dies," Naruko frowned.

"Aren't you over exaggerating? You're only twenty, so I'm sure that we can't all be dead," Sakura pointed.

"Yes, I'm sure. War tends to kill people after all. Oh look, we're here," Naruko said, her attitude doing a one-eighty.

Kakashi turned to look at the Hokage, alarm coating his features. He tried to convey it through his one visible eye. On the off chance that this wasn't an elaborate prank and what the girl was saying was true, they would go to war. A war that killed all of them. That, Kakashi decided would be bad. Very bad.

"**Brat,"** a deep voice grumbled, hidden by the shadows of the cage, "**I told you that I would eat them if you brought them here."**

Sakura shrieked, backpedaling and tripping over her own feet to get away from whatever she thought was in the cage. Sasuke's eyes widened, and he took a few steps back.

"Oh psh, Kurama, we both know that you wouldn't. We _need_ them," Naruko said sternly.

A giant fox emerged from the shadows, and stuck a fist out of the bars. Kakashi backed away, along with the Hokage and Sakura shrieked again. Sasuke fell on his butt.

Naruko beamed and put her miniscule fist up to his.

"**Hm, now what do we have here? The pink one, the avenger, an old grandfather figure and -"** the biju started.

Naruko made a weird, strangled sound that cut the demon off.

"**Oh? You don't want me to tell?" **the beast chuckled.

"What's that I hear? You won't tell anybody for fear of me shaving off all your fur? Well than, thats alright. After all, we wouldn't want pictures of that getting out to all of your brothers and sisters, now would we," Naruko said, smile radiating evil.

**"... Brat," **it grumbled.

"Hold up," Sarutobi said, after he got his voice back "just what are we doing here?"

"It's proof of course," Naruko said, and there was a heavily implied 'duh' in her tone.

"W-what is that?" Sakura stuttered pointing at the biju in the cage.

"**I am the great Kyuubi no Kitsune! The most powerful of all the biju! I am not a 'what', or a 'that'!" **the Kyuubi growled at her.

"You said that this is your mindscape, right? What's it doing here?" Sasuke demanded.

"**I am not an it!" **Kyuubi roared.

Naruko rolled her eyes while the others shuddered with fear, "Tell me, do either of you know what a Jinchuuriki is?"

"A Jinchuuriki is a person with a tailed beast sealed inside of them. It literally means 'power of human sacrifice'. That's all that was in the textbook on them…" Sakura trailed off, her eyes widening dramatically.

"Don't tell me…" Sasuke stared at her in shock.

"That I'm the Jinchuuriki of the Kyuubi no Kitsune, which you were told was dead? Okay, I wont. Doesn't stop it from being true though," Naruko said.

"You-you're the Kyuubi?" Sakura stuttered.

"No," Naruko said rolling her eyes, "I am the _container _of Kurama as you can see, Kurama over there, _he's _the Kyuubi no Kitsune. _I'm _the person that he's sealed inside. As was my mother before me and the Mito Uzumaki before her. Besides, Kurama isn't all that bad. Just grumpy for being manipulated, controlled and contained."

The Kyuubi gnashed his teeth, a low rumbling noise sounding from his throat.

"Can-can we get out of here now?" Sakura said, trembling.

"**Go,"** the Kyuubi growled, "**their too annoying. The silly one with the silver hair keeps glaring at me. Bah, like that would do anything. They weren't always like this, were they?"**

Naruko snorted, and said, "No, I have to get you to confirm that I'm actually from the future."

The biju glanced at her in annoyance, but said, "**Yes, yes. I told her about the seal that sends her back. She is whatever she has said."**

"Why should we trust you," Kakashi sneered at it.

"**What would I possibly have to gain from lying to you?" **it snarled at him.

"Time to go," Naruko said softly, gathering them all in her arms again.

With a feeling of dizyness, they were in the office again, exactly how they had been before the went to Naruko's mindscape.

Kakashi blinked away the feeling of vertigo.

The blond was smiling and rocking back on her heels. Her two teammates had quickly backed away from her, as if she might attack them.

The Hokage sighed.

"You're really from the future," it wasn't a question, but Naruko nodded anyways.

"Well than," he says, "I suppose you'll have to tell us about your war."


	3. Chapter 3

**Here it is. You know, I usually take longer to update, but I really have nothing to do. So, I did this. **

* * *

"You're kidding," Sakura said, finally getting over her shock, "you actually believe her? The class prankster? She's just making this up!"

"You seriously believe that? After I showed you into my mind? What, should I have showed you some memories of things that are yet to happen?" Naruko froze, "I should have done that! Why didn't I think of that before? Ugh, every bodies right, I am an idiot."

Sakura frowned. She didn't remember Naruko being this… quite. Whenever the blond had tried to talk to her before, she was always loud and annoying. Now she just seemed sorta sad. Sad and annoying.

Maybe…? But no. Naruko lived for tricking people. She got a kick out of it. Sometimes literally. She couldn't possibly be what she said, because that meant she survived a war that Sasuke died in. She was the class dobe, and Sasuke was the rookie of the year and an amazing ninja. Not to mention really, _really_ cute. With his tragic back story, his rich family, his deep dark eyes, and cool, uncaring attitude, he was everything a girl could possibly want. And his _hair_ oh kami-

While Sakura was off in Sasuke land, Sasuke himself was thinking about the girl who said she was from the future. He was extremely skeptical that she was the only war survivor, but he was almost choking off of the chakra that the fox had been giving off. If he could get just a bit of that power, it would be hilariously easy to avenge his clan by killing his brother. She might even know him from the future, and he could only get stronger. He bet he had even killed his brother. He resolved to ask her later.

Kakashi stared at Naruko in confusion. While she and the Kyuubi had said enough to make him believe her, it was a little hard to wrap his mind around. She was from the future. He got engaged. He died. His sensei's daughter got engaged. His sensei's daughter was very pretty. She was the only one who didn't die. His sensei was going to kill him for not being there for her.

Sarutobi analyzed the girl before him, so different than the one he saw only yesterday. Her eyes were sad and haunted. Her smile was pained and faker than it had ever been. The one thing that he wanted to save her from when she has friends, the inevitable day when one of them passed on, and left her. He knew that she would hold onto them more tightly than most others her age, because for as long as she could remember she had only had him and the two that ran that ramen stand of hers.

Naruko scratched her head. They were all staring at her like she was from the future… oh wait… yeah, this was weird. At least they didn't know everything. Than Kakashi would be freaking out, like the time he found out that he was romantically interested in her, and avoided her for a week. It hadn't ended well for him. Naruko had a tendency of blowing everyone's plans that included her to smithereens.

If she told Sasuke why his brother had actually killed his clan, would he look at her like when she ate all the tomatoes in his house again? Or when she told Jiji that her first act as Hokage was to paint the remaining parts of the village bright orange, would he give her that look that was supposed to make her feel like she had done something incredibly stupid, but inside he was laughing and he was only putting on the show for the ANBU that were usually hiding in the room somewhere. And she knew that Sakura would absolutely freak if she either found out that she kept her hair short, or what Lee looked like. As much as she loved the girl, she was quite shallow now.

Naruko cleared her throat, gaining their attention from whatever they were thinking, "This war started long before any of us were born. Long before this village was even created. Before men even had chakra. Before the biju were created. This is not a well known story, but it is true nonetheless. The fourth shinobi started with endless wars between mankind. The Shinju tree during this time was thought of as a deity, for it bore a chakra fruit every thousand years. It was forbidden to eat the fruit, but a princess ate the fruit to use it to end the wars plaguing the lands."

"That's not too bad," Sakura said, confused, "eating a fruit isn't enough to hit us back all these years later. Is it?"

"You didn't let me finish," Naruko whined, "that fruit that she are granted her chakra."

"We got chakra from a tree," Sasuke said flatly.

"Yep! But you forget, this tree is a deity. The princesses sons were the first humans born with chakra. One had the Byakugan, the other had the Rinnegan. Enraged at the power manifested in her two sons, the princess merged with the Shinju and created the Ten-Tails. They ravaged the world in an attempt to gain it's lost chakra. In the final battle, the two boys sealed the Ten-Tails into one of the boys, making him the first Jinchuuriki."

"But," Sasuke paused trying to gather his words, "he saved them."

"Yes. All Jinchuuriki technically do save people from their biju. But they're still treated like they _are _the demon. For example, Sabaku no Gaara, the Kazekage's son. He holds the One-Tail, but because of that, everybody stays away from him. And do you know what that caused? Him to go completely psychotic. His _father_, who in my opinion wins the grand prize for worst dad ever, tried to get people to assassinate him. His _father_," she snarled.

Sakura shuffled behind Sasuke, her eyes wide with fear.

The Hokage cleared his throat, giving Naruko a pointed look.

"Right," she said sheepishly, "sorry. Anyways, the boy who had the Ten-Tails sealed into him did many other things in life, which resulted in him being called the Sage of Six Paths."

"Oh! We learnt about him in the academy!" Sakura said excitedly.

"We did? Oh, I must have been skipping that day. Or I was asleep. Either way, I don't remember that," Naruko said, rubbing the back of her neck sheepishly.

"Naruko, honestly, how many times have I told you? You need to-" the Hokage started.

"-Listen more in class. It may save your life someday, young lady," Naruko pulled a face, "I never listened in class, but look how I ended up! The only one who survived the war…" she trailed off, "wow I just realized how depressing my life is."

"You didn't realize it before?" Sasuke asked skeptically.

"I was kind of preoccupied," Naruko huffed.

"Why do I have the feeling that this is going to take a lot longer than it should," Kakashi muttered to the Hokage, low enough that nobody short of Inuzuka hearing could hear him.

"Hey! They're the ones that keep interrupting me!" Or, as it turns out, Jinchuuriki's enhanced hearing.

Naruko shook her fist at him, and he had to fight his mouth from going up in a smile at how adorable the blond looked. She reminded him of Obito after Kakashi had defeated him in a spar and he would say 'One day I'll beat you, you masked bastard!', or Kushina when Minato had made a remark about ramen. Though she did end up threatening to force him to sleep on his couch for a year.

He didn't know that was Naruko's favourite threat, if just to feel the flux his emotions went through every time she said it. Ah, the advantages of being a Jinchuuriki of the Nine-Tails.

"But," Naruko said, glaring at Kakashi, a little disappointed that it didn't inspire fear for his manhood like it would later, "he knew that should he die, the Ten-Tails would be released into the world once again, he separated the biju's chakra from it's body and used some weird ability called something that I can never remember and created the tailed beasts."

Naruko paused to let that sink in.

"You're telling us that the man that saved the world from a biju," the Hokage said slowly, "created nine of them out of one? Idiot, how would that help?"

"**WHAT! HOW DARE HE! THE MAN THAT HE IS INSULTING IS TEN TIMES THE MAN HE IS HE IS!-"**

Naruko winced as the Kyuubi ranted in her head about the idiocies of humans these days. Well, not so much as ranted, but more like screamed. Man, that fox had some colourful language. What did fanny even mean?

"Naruko!" Sakura screamed in her ear.

Swearing, the blond covered her ears, futilely trying to stop the ringing.

"Kami damn it woman! Do you have to yell so loud? I have sensitive hearing you know!" Naruko whimpered.

All of the boys were grimacing, Kakashi resisting the urge to cover his own ears.

"I was calling you for the past two minutes!" Sakura defended herself.

Heaving a sigh, Naruko turned to the Hokage and summarized what the demon had been saying for the past couple of minutes "Kurama says that his Tou-san isn't an idiot, you are! But, you know, with death threats, swear words and really interesting torture methods. Huh," Naruko stared pensively at nothing, "can you actually do that without somebody dying?"

A sickly sweet grin stretched across her face, and she started to cackle.

"N-Naruko?" Sakura stuttered, "a-are you sane?"

Naruko paused her cackling, and furrowed her brow in thought.

"It's the dobe," Sasuke scoffed, "of course she's not sane."

"You're going to have to get a Yamanaka's professional opinion on this. I'm not even sure I was completely sane at the age that I'm supposed to be now, let alone at twenty," Naruko finally said, breaking the heavy silence.

The Hokage and Kakashi exchanged worried looks.

"But we're not here to talk about my sanity," Naruko said, "we're here to talk about the war. And I _still _haven't finished my story about how it all started!"

"Right," the Hokage cleared his throat, "carry on."

Naruko rolled her eyes, "So the Sage of Six Paths used this other technique thingy to make the moon and seal the Ten-Tails' chakra-less body in it."

"A jutsu created the moon," Sakura exclaimed, bewildered.

"Yea, it's really powerful. And not fun when it's used on you," she added with a grimace.

"You," Kakashi shook his head, "you know, I'm just going to expect everything from you from now on. That way you'll hopefully stop surprising me."

"I wasn't dubbed Konoha's most unpredictable ninja for nothing!" Naruko said with a cheeky, if a bit melancholic, grin.

"You're barely a ninja! Look at the clothes you wear! It's neon orange! Why even orange? It's such an ugly colour," Sakura snapped.

Naruko's slowly turned to face her, and Sakura had to resist the urge not to wet her pants. In the place of normal, cheerful bright blue eyes, were slitted, demonic red eyes.

"What did you say about orange?" she said, a threatening lit to her tone.

Sakura squeaked.

"Naruko," the Hokage sighed, "stop scaring the poor girl."

Naruko narrowed her eyes, "And just when I was thinking of telling you the sacred secret of eliminating paperwork. I will get my revenge later," she added to Sakura, her eyes fading back to their normal blue.

Both the Sandaime and Sakura paled.

"N-no! Naruko, I've been like your grandfather figure! Your Jiji! Save me from the torture of paperwork!" the Sandaime wailed.

Naruko turned her head.

"Hey," Kakashi said, snapping his fingers in front of Naruko's face, "war story time. I, for one, have some better things to do than listen to midgets-"

"Oh no. You did _not _just call me short," Naruko growled, walking up and poking Kakashi on his arm.

"Maa, maa cute little genin, so aggressive," Kakashi secretly smiling behind his mask.

"Keep this up, and I swear I'll use you for my seals practice. They tend to either blow up or set things on fire if I don't get them right," Naruko sweetly informed him.

"You'd have to find me first," Kakashi said, eye smiling at her.

"Should be easy," Naruko mused, "the tracker seal that I put on you after you did CPR does let me know where you are."

Kakashi should be mad. He should be shocked that a fresh genin, even if she was really twenty, she still had the drawbacks of being used to a different body. Instead, he was reminded of the time Minato did the same to his genin team, eyes wide with paranoia, telling them, 'You're ninja now. Anything can happen, and now I'll be able to track Obito if he ever tries to out prank a Uzumaki. The consequences of that is never good.'

"Great," Naruko's grin was downright shark-like, "I'm testing this new implosion seal. Saves me from cleaning up after myself. I've been meaning to test it out on something living."

"You are too much like your mother for this village's well being," Kakashi informed her, shuffling away from her slightly.

Naruko's smile softened, "Thank you," she told him sincerely.

"How long is this going to take?" an irritated Sasuke asked.

"We've barely even scratched the surface," Naruko said cheerfully.

"Well than keep going! Sasuke-kun doesn't want to be here!" Sakura said.

"Okay, okay. Where was I? Right, Sage guy made the moon and sealed the Ten-Tails into it, which led to the creation of the Black Zetsu, who severs the will of the princess. He comes up later. Anyways, Sage guy goes around and grants others chakra, spreads his religion and ideals or whatever, and that ends up as ninjutsu."

"So the guy makes the moon, and creates ninjutsu," Sakura said, sounding awed.

"Stop interrupting me! Jeez, you keep telling me to hurry up, but you keep interrupting me!" Naruko scowled.

Sakura flushed.

"So he wants to have peace throughout the world, but knows that he will die before that could happen, so he in trusts that dream to his two sons, whom I actually know the names of. The eldest Indra, the ancestor to the Uchiha clan his reincarnation is actually you, Sasuke," Naruko nodded to him.

Sasuke blinked in surprise, "Who else was he reincarnated into?"

"Madara Uchiha," she said, her eyes darkening.

Sasuke decided that he would ask about him too, when Naruko was in a better mood.

"The younger brother Asura, was the ancestor to the Senju clan. I inherited his chakra, and before me it was Hashirama Senju."

"We were brothers in another life?" Sasuke said, surprised again. He thought that this girl was making him feel more emotions in one hour than he did in a month.

"And we will be in this one as well. But, you know, I'll be a sister," Naruko smiled at him.

" Anyways, Sage guy he teaches them, and Indra was acknowledged as a prodigy, but it was Asura who never gave up and eventually found his own power through his friends that inspired him to separate the Ten-Tails chakra into nine bodies. He made the tailed beasts and gave each a name."

"He gave demons names," Sasuke deadpanned.

"**Foolish human. He gave me the greatest name that has ever existed!" **Kurama roared.

"Kurama says that he has the greatest name ever. He also called you foolish. Just so you know," Naruko laughed.

"So the demon doesn't just tell you to kill everything all the time?" Kakashi asked.

"No. Kurama is awesome, if a bit cynical. He's been controlled, but that is a story for another time. The ANBU that are on lunch break should be coming up in ten minutes."

"The ANBU aren't supposed to leave," Sarutobi frowned.

"But it's good that they did. I'd rather not have the fact that I'm from the future be well known. I also activated the privacy seals, and destroyed all the listening devices that were in the room. You're welcome!" Naruko grinned at him innocently.

"I see that the title of the most unpredictable ninja was well earned," the Hokage finally managed to say.

"Thank you. So some time after their creation, the young tailed beasts were told that they were all still linked to one another despite being their own person. Sage guy also told them that they would eventually become one again, yet not as they originally were, and that one shall appear at that time to show them what true power is. On his deathbed, he chose Asura to be his successor, but Indra, overcome by bitterness and envy as well as being encouraged and manipulated by Black Zetsu, fought against his brother, beginning a war between them that would continue through their descendants."

Sasuke frowned, "That's stupid. I wont fight against you for who gets to try to enforce world peace. Seems like too much work."

"Good. One thing to cross off the list for things that you fight me about. You seriously would fight anybody over the tiniest thing in the future, I swear," she groaned, "if you don't have anyone to seek vengeance on, you just sit around sulking until I take pity on you and eat all your tomatoes."

"Don't eat my tomatoes," Sasuke warned her.

Naruko cracked a smile, "Thinking that Indra or one of his reincarnations would eventually attempt to take Asura's power for themselves, Sage guy left behind a some rock thing explaining his history in an attempt to make them reconsider. Only those who've got the Rinnegan can fully decipher the contents of the tablet, while a reader with other dōjutsu such as the Sharingan can still partially interpret the information."

"Only the Sharingan? What about the Byakugan?" Sakura frowned.

"Because the Byakugan was Sage guy's brothers dōjutsu. Only the Rinnegan and the Sharingan can see it," she informed Sakura.

"Oh. I guess that makes sense," Sakura said.

"However, unknown to him, Black Zetsu had altered the contents of his tablet so he could manipulate Indra's descendants, the Uchiha clan, through the ages into resurrecting the princess and the Ten-Tails."

"So the Sage of Six paths and his brother fathered three clans," Sasuke said, "the Hyuuga, the Uchiha and the Senju."

"Through distant relations, the Uzumaki clan too," Naruko smiled.

"I think," the Hokage said tiredly, "that this is enough for today. We will meet tomorrow morning."

"What about our genin test?" Naruko frowned.

The Hokage tiredly rubbed his face, "I think I can make an exception for you three. I don't think I have to tell you that everything discussed here is an S ranked secrete," he said, glancing at them.

"Nope! I'm off, if you hear screaming it's because of my 'I'm back and won't be taking any of your shit anymore' prank! See you tomorrow!" And with that, she jumped out the window.

"I'm too old for this," the Hokage said.

"I'm too young for this," Kakashi countered.

"Sasuke-kun, would you like to go for lunch with me?" Sakura asked.

"Hn," Sasuke said.

"Do I have to have this team?" Kakashi whined.

"You think anybody else will want them? Because if you can find somebody that the council will approve of, I'm all ears."

"I think I finally know why Minato-sensei ran screaming when he saw us out of team practice time," Kakashi groaned.

"Trust me, this is only the beginning," the Hokage said, taking sadistic pleasure from the choking noises coming from Kakashi.

* * *

**Sorry for the weak end. And if this chapter is filled with stuff that you already know. But still, you gotta review. Please. Come on, you know you can find something! A mistake I made, a suggestion for next chapters, when Kakashi finds out who he gets engaged to, anything!**


	4. Chapter 4

**You guys… I honestly can't believe that I've gotten twenty reviews! You're all amazing and I love you all and give me more!... please? Am I supposed to phrase that as a question, or am I good with just demanding it from you all? Anyways, if anybody could give me an idea for a new summary, that would be great. Mine is kinda all over the place.**

**I don't own Naruto. If only I did, what do you think I'm doing going to school and listening to my mom and all that?**

* * *

Naruko didn't just pull one big prank. No, that was for when she was just an itty bitty unknowlegable little prankster. Now, she had years of Shinobi experience. And she wasn't even pulling that big of a prank. It wasn't even supposed to be permanent, but Naruko hadn't tested the seals for this out yet on real people.

That and now she knew how to tree climb now. Unfortunately, her twelve year old body didn't. She just didn't have the chakra control to. So, she had to spend a few hours of that. And no, whatever anybody else may tell you, it wasn't her that blew up a whole training ground in frustration. Really.

So when Naruko could successfully climb up walls without using her hands or falling, she set out to do her prank.

It was dark by the time she finished the tree climbing, and everyone was getting ready for bed, but that suited her needs perfectly. This prank was a little something that she wanted to do for… well ever since Kakashi had shown her the tree climbing exercise. There was just so much you could do when you could hang off of the ceiling like a bat.

Like using seals to stick every piece of furniture in Konoha to the ceiling. _Every piece_. Even in the places that people weren't supposed to know about. Like Danzo's secret Root headquarters. Or the Hokage's library and office. Or all those places that are locked up so tightly even the Sannin would have trouble getting in.

She found it was embarrassingly easy to strap all the people to their beds and sealing those on the ceiling, which was troubling, because she didn't restrict her prank to just civilians. She knew that the ninja of Konoha had gotten out of shape during the peacetime, but this was just sad. Sad I tell you! These ninja's needed a _lot _of help if they wanted to survive the war if they couldn't even detect the drugs that she had put in their drinks and/or food when they weren't looking. She didn't even have to do that for most of them.

Maybe she could talk Jiji into making a ninja boot camp. Put Ibiki in charge of it. Or even Anko. No, no! He should put Gai in charge. That ought to do it. Naruko snickered as she thought of what the ninja's faces would look like when they realized that _Gai, _the man that ran five hundred laps around Konoha every morning for a light jog would be in charge of their training. Or maybe she should only put Gai in charge of the taijutsu training and Anko in charge of the infiltration training. Have Kakashi in charge of ninjutsu, and Kurenai genjutsu. That should whip them into shape. They should put the person that was named Hayate that died sometime around the Chuunin exams in charge of the kenjutsu training. She had heard of how good he was with a sword. Making a mental note to further her plans later, Naruko continued along her merry way.

She drugged everybody she had to all in two hours. She planned on doing other things, of course. Namely switching all of the signs on the public bathrooms, using permanent paint to paint all of the ANBU masks, Root or otherwise, blinding fluorescent orange, and doing the same to all of the roads. Thankfully, the paint dried fast. She also made it so anyone who tried to wash it off got their skin turned orange.

Ah, fuuinjutsu, the love of Naruko's life. Naruko had several loves of her life, which included, in order, Kakashi, her other precious people, Ramen-sama, fuuinjutsu, and orange. Sometimes the order switched around, but that was usually it (whenever Kakashi wasn't at the top of the list, he was sleeping on the couch).

Oh, and she might have made the Hokage Tower into a giant chicken.

Not an actual chicken, that was much too much work for one night. More like she dressed it up like a chicken. She would have to do that at a latter point though.

Her shadow clones were amazing. They had her personality, when they transferred all of her memories to her after they dispelled, and Naruko could create maybe two thousand or so of them at once at this point, even more when she got her normal chakra reserves back. She had created all that she could just to get the prank done in one night.

The only downside of them is that if she leave them for any longer than seven months they kind of went insane. Like deciding that the raccoon that had made its way into her apartment should be able to breath underwater, which, as far as she knew, was swimming away it's troubles in the future, was just one of the many, _many_ experiments they conducted. Or there was that clone that dressed Gamabunta in a huge princess gown, a huge tiara and lots makeup. Oh, the scandalised look on Jiraiya's face! And she swore that the boss toad had actually _liked_ it.

Naruko shuddered as she remembered the more… creative of the insane Naruko clones. Sure, she had thought about what would come out if she combined a donkey and one of those weird, flightless birds with the long necks that stuck their heads in the ground from Suna, but to actually do it? She would have to have to have absolutely no restraint.

… actually, that would explain a lot when it came to her clones.

Naruko sat on the top of the Hokage tower when the sun was slowly making it's way up. She should hear some people waking up in five… four… three… two…now.

A screech pierced the air as a woman woke up facing the ground from the vantage point on her bed.

Now a chorus of screams, yells, shouts and screeches emitted from the village as people started waking up.

Naruko leaned back, after having a good laugh, a tear making its way down her face as her emotions finally caught up with her. _Kakashi is dead, you're all alone. _He was dead, and replaced with one that shared no memories with her, the same as everybody else she had ever known. The majority of Konoha hated her right now. This was going to be harder than she thought.

Sarutobi Hiruzen was a patient man. He had met many young ninja's in the making, but none of them were quite like his surrogate granddaughter Naruko. He wasn't certain anybody was like Naruko. Kami help him if there was. One was enough for the universe.

She was made of contradictions. The newest one was that she was twelve, but she was actually twenty.

The girl was going to give him an early death. There had been as many as thirty-four failed assassinations on the blond, and those were only the ones that he knew about. He may have been the Hokage, but he wasn't foolish enough to think that he knew everything that happened in the village.

He could spend all the time he had to worry over his impending death, but it was still the blond he worried about. Somehow, she had an effect on people that just made them better and healed them from whatever hurt from their past (it was a ninja village, it was rare to find somebody who didn't have _something_ wrong with them).

Odd a girl that was so hated by the people surrounding her could make the ones that just got to know her love her so much.

Sarutobi sighed. They would meet at nine in the morning to settle what would happen in the future, and Naruko said that she would be playing a prank. Over the years, Naruko had become for rookie ANBU what Torra the cat was for Genin, which was unherd of for a child who hadn't even graduated from the Academy yet.

It was so early in the morning, the sun hadn't even come up yet, but he could still feel that customary Naruko is Pulling Pranks Headache and the You're Getting More Paperwork Soon Headache coming on. It happened every time Naruko pulled a prank, and he got them far too often for his liking.

Now, this wasn't an odd train of thought for the grandfatherly man, and he had thought of all of this before he had even opened his eyes and gotten out of bed. The moment he did open his eyes though, his first thought was, '_Wow, my ceiling looks exceptionally like my floor today. I can even see the mark where Konohamaru stabbed a Kunai when he tripped when he was trying to kill me. Again."_

His second thought was, '_Wait a minute… that is my floor!'_

His third thought was a weary, '_How nice, Naruko left 'Naruko Was here' graffiti all over. Very subtle.' _

Sighing, he carefully observed the room. It seemed that Naruko had somehow gotten all of his things stuck on the ceiling. Including him. He was in his bed, and his bed was stuck to the ceiling.

Sarutobi just knew something like this would happen when Naruko learned the tree walking exercise. He regretted ever telling her that she would make a good Shinobi after she had snuck into his office without the ANBU or himself realizing it and had hidden under his desk on her birthday to escape the villagers. He had only noticed after she had started talking in her sleep. If he remembered correctly, it was something about Orange Ramen-sama.

He was terrified about what would happen to Konoha if Ichiraku's shut down. Naruko loved ramen from there like normal people loved oxygen. He remembered one of the Chuunin that was assigned to watch over her threatened to not feed her ramen for the week that he had to look after her. The Chuunin had spent a month off on medical leave. Naruko was truly terrifying if you threatened her precious ramen. He should know, he once told her that she should hold back on the ramen and eat healthier foods. The look she had given him… the girl was her parents daughter through and through.

Now, just how could he get out of her prank?

* * *

By the time it was nine, the only one that was in the office was a sleepy Naruko, intent on taking a nap in the Hokage's very comfy chair. And sleep she did, something she hadn't done since… Kami, when was the last time she had slept? It could have been a week, but it felt longer.

With that thought, Naruko's head hit the desk, the blond all but dead to the world.

It had been twelve by the time that the Hokage had made it back to his office, annoyance bubbling beneath the surface of grandfatherly patience. Now, the chicken Hokage tower might be bad but... _idiot, how did it take you three hours to notice the strap buckling you to the bed?_

Sarutobi had been approached by what he thought was around all the ninja that had made their way out of the prank, complaining and informing him about what the demon child had done to them, as if they didn't think that he didn't already know. He had just told them that he would work it out. And gave them The Hokage Glare Of Doom™ for calling Naruko-chan the demon child. He swore to Kami, the next person that bothered him…

Nobody was in the halls, and he doubted that the Genin would be getting here anytime soon. Naruko was probably watching the aftermath of her prank, as she so loved to do. Storming into his office, he didn't even notice her sleeping behind his desk until she let out a particularly loud snore.

"Naruko…" Sarutobi shook his head when he realized that she must have gotten no sleep last night to pull off her prank. Oh well, Kakashi should probably be showing up in an hour or so, because it was three hours after nine, and the man seemed intent on having petty revenge on his team by being a few hours late every time they met.

It indeed took Kakashi forty-five minutes to get to his office, and Naruko was still snoring away, with occasional intervals of "Ramen-sama! No! Don't turn away, I still love you!" and so on.

The moment Kakashi arrived in a shower of leaves, Naruko woke and jumped on his desk, eyes wild with panic, making papers fly everywhere.

Kakashi raised an eyebrow (or both of them, nobody ever knew what facial expression he was wearing behind that mask), "Am I late?"

Blinking, Naruko's face flushed pink, and immediately got down from where she was towering over everybody. The Hokage chuckled, "If you're late, your other two Genin are even later."

Shocked, Naruko could only make a little squeaky noise. Kakashi, earlier than, not one, but _two_ people? That was even more unlikely than her going back in time!

Snickering under his breath at the looks on his two ninja's faces, the Sandaime gleefully thought, _payback,_ because, yeah as much as he loved the girl and loved how useful and efficient Kakashi was, if felt good to get them back for just a tiny moment.

And he could see the looks that Naruko had given him when she thought nobody was watching. It was the same look on her face as she had just before eating a bowl of ramen, and that could only mean one thing.

The person that Naruko was engaged to was Kakashi. Sarutobi knew her better than anybody, and that was definitely her enamoured look. But that was okay. Once he got over the fact that Kakashi was fourteen years older than her, it would be fine. And if Kakashi got ridiculous missions every once and a while, well, somebody had to do them. And why not Kakashi?

Kakashi didn't like the glint in the Sandaime's eyes. In fact, it was exactly that look that he had right before Kakashi was sent to watch little Naruko-chan when she was little to make sure that nothing bad would happen to her. It was especially hard that one time the little girl had turned to where he was hiding in watch and forced an instant ramen cup into his hand. Just like Kushina and sometimes Minato would do when he stayed up training for too long and had to hid from them to get out of a lecture.

Naruko may have never been the smartest person, but she knew for at least a year Kakashi looked at her and didn't see Naruko, but her parents. It was visible in his eyes. Er, eye? Anyways, it would take some time for Kakashi to start thinking of her as her own person. She should start doing stuff that her parents wouldn't do. Let's see, her father was a fuuinjutsu genius and he created the Ransignan, so using that for a while around him was out (she knew this already. Jiraiya would have to 'teach' it to her for her to use it. How else would she know it?). Her mother, on the other hand was a pranking genius and cheerful all the time.

She _could _go around giving out free ramen to the people who couldn't get it for themselves, as neither of her parents would give away of their ramen, but the people would think that she was poisoning them (and she really didn't want to give away any of her precious ramen).

What to do, what to do?

That's it! Naruko knew exactly what to do. She would put her beginning stages of her Force Kakashi To Stop Viewing Her As Her Parents And Therefore Force Him To Fall In Love With Her (FKTSVHAHPATFHTFILWH for short) plan into action later.

"Naruko-chan, would you care to explain why we found ourselves stuck to the ceiling? Furthermore, why I couldn't get my Icha Icha off the bookshelf?" an irritated Kakashi asked.

"Because I thought that the student of my father would at least know how to counteract a simple sticking seal?" Naruko innocently suggested.

"You know who your parents are?" The Hokage asked cautiously. At her nod, he turned to Kakashi with a smirk, "She's got you there."

"Okay, so I might not have thought of that, but it's Icha Icha!" he protested.

"Fine," Naruko said shortly, ignoring the way this eye widened slightly. He obviously didn't expect her to let him have his porn. Her parents wouldn't have done that!

"Here's an extra, I nicked it off the old man," Naruko held out the book to him, ignoring the Hokage's splutters.

Kakashi greedily grabbed the book, too upset to even eye smile at her. Naruko sweat dropped.

"You know," Sarutobi intoned, "It's supposed to be illegal to steal from the Hokage."

"It's okay! I stole from Baa-chan and Kakashi- I mean Kakashi-sensei- too!" Naruko flushed a little at her slip up. She was supposed to refer to him as Kakashi-sensei now, damnit!

"No," Kakashi said, face pale, as he the implications in her words hit him, "I'm not going to be the Hokage. No."

"It's fine! You were only the temporary Rokudaime. I took your place afterwards!" Naruko beamed at him.

The Sandaime balanced, "What did you do to my village?"

"I protected it, like my father and my mother before me. And I might have painted Konoha the marvelous colour of orange."

"Naruko… you don't ever change, do you?" Sandaime shook his head with a small smile on his face.

"This is very nice and all," Kakashi said, "But can we get my two cute little Genin over here? We need to talk."

"Of course! How could I forget? Ugh, they're probably still strapped to their beds," Naruko muttered, rummaging around in a bag that was by her feet.

"Aha! Found them!" Naruko held up two seals in a triumphant manner. If he wasn't so curious about what she had found, Kakashi would have rolled his eyes.

As if reading his mind, Naruko explained, "These are the seals connected to the seals that I put on the straps. All I need to do is find Sasuke's and Sakura's, and bam! The're on the floor, hopefully without any broken bones and in here in less than an hour!"

Kakashi and Hiruzen shared a look.

* * *

"I don't see why we couldn't have done it my way. The worst they could have gotten is a few broken bones," Naruko complained.

Sakura blanched, "WHAT?"

"Yeah! It's nothing! See, Sakura-chan agrees with me! It's only broken bones!" Naruko nodded sagely.

"Baka! If I get broken bones, I'll have to go to the hospital and I won't get to spend as much time with Sasuke-kun! And they'll make me ugly!" Sakura cried.

Sasuke grunted, but glared at Naruko.

"Geez you guys, if you think that broken bones are the worst you'll ever get, why are you even ninja? Back when I'm from- that sounds so weird- I got, hell we all got so much worse! And do you know what? We gave as worse as we got." Naruko stubbornly set her jaw.

Her outburst caused both Sasuke and Sakura to go silent.

But not for long…

"Yosh! My eternal rival!" Sasuke and Sakura stared wide eyed at the spandex clad green _things_ that came barreling towards them.

"Oh!" Naruko said as if struck by realization. Sarutobi shuddered at the look of mischief in her eyes, "You're Might Gai, aren't you? And you're Rock Lee?"

Sakura snapped to attention. _That_ was what she married in the future? B-but… his eyebrows were the size of both of her thumbs put together! Did her older self get his on the head one too many times? He wasn't even nearly as handsome as Sasuke-kun! Hell, even _Shino_ was more attractive than him!

Naruko as she noticed the expression on Sakura's face. Oh boy, was that girl in for a rude awakening. She remembered the time that Ino waxed Lee's eyebrows in his sleep. He looked _way_ cute, but there was something so _wrong_ with the image. It was like Kiba without Akamaru or Kakashi going around with no mask. It just wasn't right. She thinks that was around the time that Sakura had realized that while Lee could be… well _Lee_ 'nuff said, he was also madly in love with her and also a really good person. So she went on the wild adventure that is falling in love. Now, to get her to fall in love with him again… that'll be harder than getting Kakashi to take off his mask.

"Yosh! Who is asking after our youthful selves?" Lee yelled, all the while staring at Sakura, a small blush on his face.

"I'm Uzumaki Naruko dattebayo! I'm going to be the Hokage! These are my teammates Uchiha Sasuke-teme and Haruno Sakura-chan!" she had missed Lee, who had died with his baby boy and Sakura.

"Sakura-chan! A fitting name for a blossom as beautiful as you!" Lee said.

"Uh…," Sakura clearly wasn't moved, "Thank-you?"

"Yosh! How youthful Lee-kun! You have found your youthful love!" Gai shouted.

"Gai-sensei!"

"Lee-kun!"

"Gai-sensei"

"Lee-kun!"

"My eyes," wailed, surprisingly, Sasuke, "My eyes are burning!"

"At least," Kakashi said, a haunted look in his eyes, "You've never seen it with your Sharingan."*

Sasuke shuddered and for the first time in forever he wondered if Itachi was doing the family good by putting them out of their misery.

"Aww! I haven't seen Gai-sensei like this since Lee died. It's nice," Naruko smiled sadly.

Kakashi frowned, and stared at his bushy browed friend as if he was going to go _poof_. She said everybody died… that would mean Gai too, wouldn't it?

He doesn't know how many more friends he could stand seeing dead.

Sensing the declining mood Naruko shouted, just to freak everybody out, "Yosh! Where did you get your youthful green spandex? I know just the person who it would bring out their springtime of youth!"

"How youthful for you to help other find their springtime of youth!" Gai shouted, "I have made my youthful clothing!"

Naruko snickered, "Great! Can you help me make some for my friend?"

"Yosh! I would love to, but you will have to go to my protegé, Lee-kun, for to truly master an art, you will have to be able to teach it!" Gai said wisely.

"Right…" Sarutobi cleared his throat, his grandfatherly smile fighting to stay in place, "I believe that we have some matters to discuss, so we shall be taking our leave."

They were all gone faster than you could say 'Rude'.

"Gai-sensei? Will you teach me how to woo my beautiful Sakura-chan?" Lee asked tentatively.

"Lee-kun! I will show you the youthful ways of getting a woman youthful heart in the most youthful ways!" Gai shouted, tears of youthful pride making it's way down his cheeks.

Sakura suddenly felt a chill go down her spine.

* * *

**Should I start adding in flashbacks? I mean, I could make them really funny or really sad or really fluffy. You guys tell me!**

**Okay, nothing really happened this chapter. It sucks, but the next chapter will be **_**really **_**good.I'll get started for that soon but for now… **_**school**_**. I shall slay the dreaded beast called homework, and then I will get to working on this, and it'll be up soon. I love you all, and I'll love you even more when you give me reviews!**


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